Underestimated based on looks :)

It never fails to amaze me just how much folks are judged by how they look.. It was a interesting weekend in so many ways, I will get into lots of details on the horse blog, as I took not just one but two  clinic’s this weekend, one day was all about equine dental and hoof training and care, the second was on Mounted Search and Rescue.

Now I meets some very fine ladies, and some excellent instuctors, and I had a good time and let me make this perfectly clear, I did not in any way feel unwelcome, and in fact I expect that if I was to run into at least couple of the ladies just in general life, we would stop chit-chat and if I ever went riding to some of the local events, I would feel that the weekend of getting to know them would be enough that I would be willing to head off alone and feel comfortable for the day.

But having said that, I am a people watcher, both for other and for myself and wow the amount of looks, and judgement that was taking place over the two days hit me and stuck me a bit..

They were there to read, body shifting, eyes lowering, eye rolling, crossing of legs, crossing of arms and even worse, the curl of the lip at times,  Only one got to me, there was a person, that to tell the truth I liked, but he took one look at me and dismissed me.. It was not even a underestimate, it was a clear dismissal, I was not worth his time..

I think it surprised me a bit, but I wanted him to answer two questions for me, and when I want info, I am like a dog with a bone, I will get it.. He blew me off AGAIN, the eyes went up and down my obese body and he just “knew” I was not worth answering, I smiled, and engaged again, this time he blew me off on my question based on cost!  That! was were my temper sparked..

You see I don’t really give a furry rats behind if you want to judge me based on my body, its mine, it does it job and I am blessed with remarkably good health all things considered, but to decide at a glace that I am poor pissed me off, I am frugal, and I will admit that I do drive a old paid for vehicle, and yes, my clothes are well worn and I don’t much do makeup etc, but that just means that when I WANT to do something, I do have the funds to make it happen or I will tighten the belt, save and get it done..

So I know I got the steel in the eye and my voice got just a little grr to it, and I said, I would like the name of the company offering the course,  he said, its for folks of advanced level..  folks that have spent time in the bush.

I had a choice, walk away or give a lesson, on judging a book by its cover, I could have gone girly and given info in a flirty way but I was beyond that, so I started asking him questions, one the first, he looked at me funny, but by the fifth one, as I pressed for more details and dismissed his basic’s by answering them, he finally!!  blinked and the head went back, the shoulder’s softened and he said, where all have you lived mam?

After I answered him, he went Oh, and suddenly, he wants my contact and the information I was looking for flowed forth, and it was useful and I am grateful for it, I will use in the future.

However, I watched more minor but there interactions between the rest of the folks at the clinic’s, Why do we all judge and I am not better, I did it myself, there was a person at the one that asks what I don’t consider newbie or even basic, I consider it common sense, and it bugged me that so much of the time was taken up answering questions that a month spent with your horse would give you the answers.

I think that was one thing that really struck me, the clinic’s were filled with women, and the instructors in both cases were men, the one day it was a younger man who was highly skilled in his trade and he was like going to collage and getting a really good school lecture with question and answer, he flowed like a river but his bottom line was simple

Spend time with your horse and listen to them, if they understand what you are asking of them, and they choose to act out, take the time to figure out why, rather then assume they are being bad or willful!

The second clinic had three but the one did most of the horse stuff and he was a trail rider, packer and while living in Ontario was western (alberta an B.C.) though and though, Loved listening and learning from him..

His message was simple, your horse is always learning, its only going to be as good of a horse as you help make it by doing things with it, and here was the big one, it will only go as far as your trust in it will..

That is a true statement if I have ever heard it.. If you ask your horse to do something, and you think it can’t, the odds are darn likely that you will fall, if you ask your horse to do something and you believe in they can do it, 99 percent of the time, they will prove you right..

I would love to think that one day, we will be judged by our actions instead of our looks but I don’t think that will ever truly be the case..

So tell me, when was the last time that you were judged just by looks, no time taken by the person to even try to see if you had the knowledge or skills to do it?

This entry was posted in Life moves on daily. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Underestimated based on looks :)

  1. Unknown's avatar Verla says:

    Good for you D-I-L. I see this at work, people being judged on their looks, especially an obese or overweight person. Some people never give them a chance or try to get to know them. I get doubly angry because I think of you and what you must go through sometimes. You are a very loving, kind and knowledgable person and well worth knowing.

  2. Marie's avatar Marie says:

    That is a very good post Farm Gal. 🙂

  3. Cecilia Mary Gunther's avatar cecilia says:

    What excellent advice to listen to your horse. Though i am sure that is exactly what you do anyway, knowing you and good for you sticking to your guns, i get a lot of this as a foreigner living in america.. no one bothers me if i just keep my mouth shut! c

  4. you asked “So tell me, when was the last time that you were judged just by looks, no time taken by the person to even try to see if you had the knowledge or skills to do it?”

    I get this every day I go to work and they dismiss my skills based on my look:(

Leave a reply to cecilia Cancel reply