I had a moment yesterday where I was just stopped in my tracks and to be honest for bit, I was speechless and that is not a easy thing to happen to me..

I was over at a friends who had been offered the hides on some young calf’s that had passed away.. (I will back to my hide/calf in a bit) and I had asked if it would be possable for me to get one of the hides to which I was told yes, (thank you again for letting me!)

but when I “assumed” that these were calves that had died from their own cows but you know what assume means right??

Needless to say, I got the rest of the story and it was enough to leave me speechless and slack jawed, these sweet beautiful calves had been hauled in to the local auction and for nothing, they had been got and brought home to see if they could make it, different barns, different farmers, not wanted because they are made the mistake of being born male in a dairy..

Lets just say that skill is needed to keep one of these calves alive, and skill is lacking..

You know sometimes you allow those you work with to hide you from the truth.. you see I am used to Farmer R, it took me YEARS to get him to agree to sell me a calf, because he didn’t want to sell me a calf, ME not have skills and the calf die..

When I got Girl, he called me and said come get her, when I got to the barn, she was lightly scouring, and he was very unhappy, said, I didn’t need to take her, said, she had not been doing that when he had called and refused to let me pay for her for weeks just in case she died on me.. he will not let them go before they have a full week on the farm milk.

I babied her and made sure she got the best qualtiy milk replacer and I moved her into the small red shed so that if she did pass, I would not have spread the germs in my big main barn and as you are aware she is a big healthy fully grown 140o pd expecting girl now..

Marty was different, he was big and strong and never gave me a single moment of worry the whole time I had him, he was raised in a stall next to girl and had a granny sheep that was his Mom and buddy, I was able to steal a wad or two of girls cud and put it into marty to make sure his ruman got started off right.

But this, this well, these babies where treated in a way that twists me in the guts, it makes my eyes want to burn with unshed tears and my inner spirit cry out in pain and anger..

Worst yet, while two of the bodies are just blanks when it comes to that spark of a spirit that all living things have, one was not.. don’t get me wrong, he was not alive, but he was for lack of a better word haunted, or hovered..

I could not stop myself, I had to reach out and stroke his head and say from spirit to spirit, i’m sorry and please move on..

For anyone that is reading that does not believe in souls or the devine life force, this post is not for you and I respect your right to your choices, and I am going to ask you respect mine..

I believe everything has a spark of that devine life in them, if its alive, its part of the whole system of life.. as someone who raises animals and looks them in the eye when they first open it and who then takes their lives for their bodies uses, I feel that it should be done with RESPECT, I don’t care what culture you are from, or what prayer is offered, something should be murmered between your spirit and theirs..

That is what strike me deep inside on this one.. not that the babies calvies died, but that they were not treated well from the moment of their birth to the moment of their death.. that they were considered disposable, without value..

Is that really to much to ask for us to do.. If we are going to take them away from their momma’s for our own uses fine, but have respect for them, give them safety, warmth and food and if you can affection and a gentle voice and hand till the time comes..

I hear it all the time, so many folks live in town and the city that they have lost touch with the animals, but this shows me that, that touch that is being lost even in those that live on the land..  and it filled me with shame..

Shame for my fellow man.. I am sad and I will mourn for not just the loss of those calvies and the hundreds and thousands like them born each year, but I will mourn for that little part of me that had faith in my fellowman that died just a little more with them..